Hot for Teacher!

NEWSFLASH:
Jenna Bush is going to be working at an elementary school located less than 2 blocks away from my new apartment. Indubitably, we will be rendezvousing during her recesses at the Raven, the local dive bar. Is this part of Dubya’s plan to improve the education system? Egads.
I can see the drink specials being scribbled on the Raven’s chalkboard now: “Jenna&Tonic”
Honestly, this is the most exciting thing that has happened to me in weeks.
Actually, that is a lie. I received a potato peeler from my mom for Hannukah the other night. I have to be able to continue to produce the high quality latkes you have grown accustomed to in previous posts!
Perhaps I could apply for a job as the lunch lady at Elsie Whitlow Stokes Elementary?
Or maybe, I’ll go to law school… if they let me in.
I have tried to rewrite my Personal Statement more times than Lincoln edited the Gettysburg Address on that Dunkin Donuts napkin on the train up to PA. The applications are ridiculously complicated too. I feel like I am somehow accidentally implicating myself in an international conspiracy by checking the wrong box. These things are harder to fill out than the LSAT itself, and I didn’t do very well on that either…
Oh well. Any kids at Elsie Whitlow want some fish sticks?